Exactly As They Should Be

Sometimes I have those moments where I just can't believe this is my life.  How did I get here???  This morning was one of those moments.

I was driving down the highway to take Wade to a makeup speech therapy session, and the accessible parking tag hanging from the rear view mirror caught my attention.  I looked down at my lowered--and very messy and cluttered--floor boards in our wheelchair accessible van.  How did this happen?   My dream car--a lovely, roomy minivan with more cupholders than necessary--had to be sold for this.  (I know you're probably still stuck on the part that a minivan was my dream car, but it was!)

I remember the nights when staying up past midnight meant that I could be lazy the next day.  Or if I did have to go to work, I could suffer through the day knowing that the couch would be waiting for me as soon as I made it home.  Instead, last night I was up past midnight sitting with two dear friends at my kitchen table as we deliriously hammered out goals and objectives for an upcoming ARD meeting...and it wasn't for Wade.  And when my head finally hit the pillow, I knew that today would not welcome laziness, but just more work for everything that lies ahead.

When did I become the stay at home mom that doesn't have time for anything?  I don't even have time to clean my house and do laundry on a regular basis.  I can never seem to figure out how to land and just be.  There's always something to do.  I haven't updated this blog in over a month, even though I have so much I want to say and keep record of.  Who said that stay at home moms don't really work???

I shouldn't be surprised, really.  Growing up, I just knew I'd be married by the magical age of 23.  I'd have 2.5 kids, a dog, and the white picket fence.  I'd be a teacher forever.  However, I didn't get married until I was 31.  I owned a house with a friend when I was single.  I moved to Florida.  I moved again to Texas.  I never thought I'd live away from my family.  I was 30 before I finally became a teacher, and now I am blessed to be able to stay at home with Wade.  As I've figured out, things rarely go as planned, or as I envision them anyway.  So, to have a perfect pregnancy at the age of 32/33, with a most traumatic delivery, which resulted in my first child having a disability, shouldn't really shock me.  Most of the time it doesn't.  Sometimes though, the simple things like an accessible parking tag and wheelchair accessible entrances are glaring signs that my life is so much different than I ever, ever imagined it would be.

Then, I see this sweet face looking back at me, and I realize things are exactly as they should be!

Wade in his turkey hat he made in school.

PPCD...Take two

We went back to the school on Thursday so that Wade could be evaluated by the OT, PT, and speech therapist.  I have to say, this time around, it was a much better experience.  One of the teachers also joined us to take notes.  Unfortunately, Wade had just come from an hour of PT and OT, so he wasn't in the greatest of moods.  Plus, there were a bunch of strangers surrounding him wanting him to perform on demand, which he does not do!  

The school is beautiful though!  The halls and classrooms are all so brightly decorated.  It seems like a very inviting atmosphere.  I was very impressed with the equipment in the motor lab and the equipment that they are wanting to buy with some stimulus money.  They even had a brand new Kid Walk in the motor lab.  The staff were all very nice and friendly and seemed genuinely interested in doing what is best for Wade.  I was able to express my concerns about Wade being in a self-contained classroom.  I want him to be around typical kids as well.  I know he needs extra help with mobility and self-help things, but he also needs to be surrounded by kids who are walking and talking so he can learn from them.  Wade is a very social little boy, and he needs that interaction.  All in all, it was a very informative meeting, and I feel a lot more comfortable with sending him to school in the fall.  (And, I only cried twice!)

On Friday afternoon, we had our official ARD meeting.  (IEP meeting for those who aren't in TX.)  Being a special education teacher, I've sat through my fair share of these meetings.  It's a whole different ballgame sitting on the other side of the table!  Things were going along very smoothly.  We were happy with the goals and with the therapy time.  Then came placement.  I told them that at this point, we are looking at just doing a 3 day school week so that Wade can still go to his regular sitter 2 days a week to get that social interaction.  They stumbled a little, but said it was doable and he would just be counted absent on the two days he's not there.  Of course they strongly suggest 5 days, and when we come back to ARD, if he hasn't met his goals, it's probably because he's only in school 3 days a week.  Blah, blah, blah.  One of the teachers did suggest that maybe he could still come 5 days and go to daycare after school since he would be in the morning PPCD class.  That was something I hadn't thought of, so I appreciated the suggestion.  While I know Wade will flourish in this new environment, as a mom, it's very hard for me to let my 3 year old baby go to school!!!!!

After that was out of the way, they said they were recommending he be in a self-contained class for 3 1/2 hours... Stop right there!  I jumped in and asked if there were other options (I knew there were).  Since this center also serves pre-k and the employee daycare center, there are definitely typical kids Wade can be with.  So, although I'm not completely comfortable with this time, we decided on a half-hour inclusion time out of 3 1/2 hours.  I settled for this since I'm contemplating the 3 days a week.  If, however, Wade shows them what he's made of, we will definitely be going back to ARD after school starts.  I'll give it a good 6 weeks for everyone to settle into a routine, then reassess the situation.

So, it's official.  On August 23, my baby will be starting school!

And so it begins...

I've been off the blogging scene for almost two years now.  I went through and deleted all of my old posts, but I kept the ones that pertained to Wade.  I figure today is a good day to start recording our journey again because things are definitely changing.  Starting with our first meeting to enroll for PPCD.

Our first meeting was scheduled for today at 1:00 with Eagle Mountain Saginaw ISD.  We still are not 100% that Wade will attend PPCD in the fall, but I want to make sure I've researched all of our options in order to make the best decision.  Since he turns 3 next Saturday, we have to get the ball rolling.  Technically he can start school the day he turns 3, but since it's the end of the school year, we're definitely opting to wait until fall to begin.

Things did not start out on a very good foot.  When the diagnostician came out to greet us, she told us that we were supposed to have brought Wade with us.  Well, when I asked over the phone if there was anything we needed to bring to the meeting, she should've told me at that point!  She said she assumed I would've known to bring him.  First of all, even though I'm a special education teacher and I've sat in tons of ARDs,  I've never had my own child go through the process.  Second of all, it was never explained to me that this particular meeting was for evaluations.  I thought it was for all the adults to discuss plans for Wade and evaluations would come later.  After that little mishap was cleared up, we decided to proceed with the evaluations we could do without him.  We now have to take him back Thursday morning so he can be assessed by the OT, PT, and speech therapist.  Our ARD is now scheduled for this Friday at 3:15.

And so it begins.  Our official start to the world of special education in the public school system.  I have to honestly say, I'm NOT ready for this!